So most of you who read this blog know my story – the ups, the downs, the good and the bad. I learned a lot over the years, particularly to keep my personal stuff a little closer to home. I’ve always had trouble with that because I’m my mother’s daughter – I talk. And talk. And talk some more. Getting online only gave me more people who would listen, so I blabbed on, not realizing that sometimes that wouldn’t be a great idea for some things. I learned from that, and while I’m still talking, I generally give a lot more consideration to the things I say now, and I try to be really careful. (Possibly see: much more boring.) But sometimes, life makes you ridiculously happy and you just have to share that or else you’ll explode. Hence this blog entry. (Possibly see: much more interesting. Hopefully.)
In case you haven’t see the 954,469,543,345 times I’ve gushed about the love of my life, I’ll give you a little recap now:
This was the love affair that wasn’t supposed to happen*. Jake and I dated twenty years ago when we met in college. He was the love of my life, my first love, my everything. We ended up splitting up after a couple years because he was changing schools and well, we both needed to grow the hell up. We were kids at 20 and 22. We didn’t even know how to be adults, never mind how to love someone else. But still, we were great together, and when we broke up, my world was completely shattered and it literally took me YEARS to get over him (ask any of my friends. They will gladly tell you how much they wanted to punch me in the gullet to shut me up after three years of whining).
We did not keep in touch -it was too hard. Over the years, we would ask friends about each other, so we always had a tab on each other’s whereabouts, but that was really it. He was the love that I measured everyone else up to. He treated me so well, that it was almost impossible for anyone else to live up to that, particularly the men that *I* chose.
This past December, I got an email from Jake asking if I was around to get together and catch up. I didn’t think anything of it, other than I never thought I’d get an email like that from him. We met, had a couple drinks, caught up, talked about EVERYTHING (including my divorce – see where my head was at?!), and then said our goodbyes. We texted a little here and there, but I still thought nothing of it until February. It was my 40th birthday, and two dozen anonymous roses showed up for me with this message:
Happy Birthday and Happy Valentine’s Day!
Pink Roses Signify: Grace and Elegance and Admiration and Beauty.
Orange Roses Signify: Fascination, Passion, and Enthusiasm
You encompass these traits in spades!
-An admirer from afar
I had NO idea who they were from until I looked at the sender address in CA and put 2+2 together. I texted him and said, “Um, weird question…but did you send me roses?” He replied with a smiley face. But STILL, I didn’t get it. Plus, he LIVED IN CALIFORNIA.
In the spring, I got an email from him asking to get together and go dancing. He took me out to a wonderful dinner, and then we danced all night. (Note: he actually took dance lessons. I mean, how AWESOME is that?!) That was it: I was pretty much done from that point on. As soon as we went out, we both just knew: we are meant to be together. He was and is the love of my life. I have never been as connected with anyone the way I am with him. I knew it twenty years ago, and I know it now. And the best thing is, so does he. We’ve openly admitted that we are the love of each other’s life. And that doesn’t happen every day. Or at all for a lot of people. We’re very aware of that and how very, very lucky we are to have reconnected the way we have.
Jake is not someone you let go. He’s a good person. I can’t stress that enough. His heart is so good, and he’s so thoughtful and generous and giving. He’s also a musician too, so he “gets” me. I’ve always had people support what I do, but I underestimated how important it is to me to be able to talk about it – in depth and with interest – with my partner, and for him to have music as such an equally important part of his life, it makes our two lives connect so much easier. He’s a character: quirky, eccentric, and amazing in every way to me. I love him so very much. And even better? I adore his family. When I saw them over the summer for the first time in almost 20 yrs, it was like no time had passed at all. They’ve always been incredibly loving with me, and they still are. I feel lucky that they are all part of my life again. And I’m not saying that just because this is a blog entry online, I really mean it: I love them to pieces.
*I remember when he started contacting me again that I was ADAMANT with my girlfriends, saying that I was just going to have to let him know that we could just be friends because I was NOT moving anywhere and it just wouldn’t work long distance. And I was right. It won’t. And that’s why I’m moving.
Many of you guessed it, which wasn’t too difficult considering the amount of time I’ve been spending here. :) But I absolutely LOVE it here. Even with the gigantic heat wave that just started to stave off, I’m in love with the weather here, the people here (SO incredibly friendly), everything about our little town. The biggest issue we have right now is trying to figure out the most cost-effective way to get all of my stuff and my two dogs from Massachusetts to California. It’ll take a little time to coordinate, so it won’t be for a little bit, but it’s a definite, and I ridiculously happy about it. I’m going to be a Southern California girl! (Well, older girl. lol)
And the most important thing: he’s worth the move. He’d do it for me in a second, but I insisted. I want to live somewhere different, and experience and different culture and part of the country. The fact that I get to do it with him only makes it better. He didn’t suggest it – I did, and now that I’m here, I know that I should always follow my instinct, because it’s wonderful here. We’ll probably eventually be back on the east coast because that’s where all of our friends and family are, but for now, we’re on a great adventure together, and I can’t wait.
And oh? There will be more news in the future – soon. You know I always have to give you a teaser. ;)